Tuesday, December 28, 2010

The Case of the Missing Mouse

In November, at a burglary scene near Seneca, S.C., deputies found Noah Smith, 31, naked and apparently drugged, perhaps on hallucinogenic mushrooms, and with a string-like object protruding from his buttocks. Smith was X-rayed, revealing (according to the deputies' report, which made its way to the Internet) that the object in his rectum was a "mouse."

However, several days later, the sheriff's office clarified that the object was a "computer mouse." Smith told emergency room personnel that he had no memory of the incident.

[WCSC-TV (Charleston, S.C.), 11-8-10]


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  1. Hmmm...a likely story. I have a very good friend who works in Accident and Emergency in a large hospital in the UK, and you would be amazed at the different objects that get stuck in the same place as the above (and other orifices). The most common object seems to be the lightbulb, and they even have a tried and tested method for removing them, involving a long bandage and plaster of paris...which when set enables the object to be removed safely without breaking......eeeew!

  2. I thought the most amusing part was the fact that the authorities felt it imperative to make the clarification. I mean, if I had to vote, a (presumably dead) mouse lodged up there IS a worse than merely a computer mouse. If I had to vote.

    As far as your story about the light bulb, it just seems like a waste of a bad situation. Why not have the person sing "You light up my Life" and rig him/her up as a human bed side lamp? I'm the sort that takes all the lemons Life hands me and makes lemonade.

  3. Haha...love it!! It got me thinking about one or two other objects that my friend mentioned...a goldfish and a bust of Shakespeare...maybe I'd better change the subject at this point!

  4. Only in England you would ever find a bust of Shakespeare THERE! Wonder what heat argument led up to that?

  5. In Chuck Palahnuik's "Choke," there is a long and very detailed section about the things that have been found in people's bottoms, and how they're removed. It's quite interesting and well-researched, though it does turn the stomach a bit...


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